I've gotten an invitation to go to WOMAD in July, and I'm trying to decide if I really want to go. It looks like there will be a lot of fun workshops to go to, but it also looks like the bulk of the festival is, well, live music.I don't really like live music.
I know, I know, I'm a heretic. Let me explain.
I have very sensitive hearing. Loud noises *hurt*. When I go see concerts, I generally stay as far away from the speakers as humanly possible and take binoculars so I can see the performers. And seeing the performers isn't necessary for me, really; if I can get into a good spot and listen for all the overtones and undertones, I'm happy. They is, if there are any overtones or undertones; most outdoor amplification completely strips out the very things that make music enjoyable for me.
Music, for me, is something to be paid attention to. Something to be enjoyed alone, quietly. Something to be listened to over and over again until I've memorized it. I eat music, I chew it up and swallow it and deconstruct it and listen to just the melody or harmony lines. The important part is the repetition--I have to be able to listen to something multiple times to really enjoy it. And it always needs to be played reasonably quietly (reasonably quietly means that I don't have to raise my voice to talk to someone across the room when the music is playing).
Even when I'm upset, the volume stays low. If it gets loud, I lose the delicious subtleties on the interplay between voice and instrument and it just becomes noise.
One of the most miserable experiences of my life was going to see a show at the Showbox a while back. I'd heard a couple of albums of theirs before, but I didn't own any so I hadn't sat down with the albums and just *listened*. so I wasn't actually familiar with anything they were playing. The people I was with insisted on going up to the front of the stage and standing in front of one of the huge speakers.
I'd accidentally left my earplugs at home.
The sheer sonic blast coming out of the speakers overwhelmed me. I couldn't hear any music for all the noise that was pouring out and buffeting my entire body. For someone else, this might have been a thrilling experience; all I knew was pain and sheer overwhelm. And I was trapped there by the press of the crowd.
After a few minutes spent actively fighting panic, I felt myself gently dissolve into my feet. I think I spent most of the hour they were playing simply swaying gently in place. There wasn't anyone home.
After the noise stopped, I snapped sharply back into my body. I was nearly completely deafened for a few days, and the headache I was left with took a hot bath and a whole bunch of painkillers to get rid of. It wasn't as bad as it could have been, certainly; without my ability to just mentally slide away, I would have been subjected to that wall of sound for an hour, holding on to my panic with tooth and nail.
That was easily the worst experience I've ever had with live music, but I have a host of others. Much of the time, after I've seen a live performance by someone I've never heard before, I'll borrow the album because I know they can't *really* be as horrible as they sounded on stage. Outdoor acoustics are invariably incredibly horrible, and this colors even the best music.
There are people who claim that going to see live music is a powerful experience, that the presence of the artist adds something indefinable to the music. This is true with me with classical music performances, and I can see how that would be true for some people with rock music.
But it's not true for me.
Something else I don't understand while we're on the topic of music: meeting the people who make the music. I don't get it. Does it really make a difference if you've been sweated on by Madonna or shaken Trent Reznor's hand? I can enjoy what an artist does and never have any desire to meet the creator; my only exception to this is authors, but even then I seek them out as a fellow writer, not as a fan.I vastly prefer to appreciate the art instead of the ego. I can appreciate a talent without appreciating the person who possesses it.
Will meeting the person who makes the art give me a deeper understanding of that art? no? Then I won't seek out famous artists.
Ye gods I am bitchy today.I have no idea what the hell is up with me. Up, down, all around, kicking at doors trying to get people to send me paperwork. I'm hoping that this is just stress; we'll see if thing get better once the house is settled.
I certianly hope so. I hate reacting to everything with irritation.
