new year
you go before me
in this candlewarm room,
not as dreams but realizations
of grief. in this circle
as we speak the names of the dead
the things we leave behind
the gifts we send to Hades
the candles flicker;
and I begin to speak.
tonight I put down my grief
carried close for a year.
Tonight I release you from me,
shining boy who died too young,
my quirky black-sheep aunt
dead after 15 painful years.
tonight I put down my anger
carried until it was a worn shadow
tattered like a voodoo doll
well-used over many years.
Tonight I put down my cruelty
that protected me for so long.
And here in this circle surrounded
by love you go before me;
carried in Persephone's arms
held warm through the lightless time.
Messages of love and apology
are carried down to the dark halls;
we sing together, and wait for light.
11/2/99