time out of mindI wasn't all there you know
me by my hands which are wings
and then spiders, clutching
and hairy a legacy
of my Black Irish grandfather
the cad who gave me this dark hair
this eager duplicitous temperperhaps I am blaming him or you
blaming Schrödinger's box on the cat
trapped prisoner of the decaying atom
and the uncertain gas snared
by the collapsing probability waveCobweb flits by my face and I wonder
where I misplaced summer jasmine
scented hours speaking to the small invisible
who lived beneath the tangerine tree
leaving me behind and shining
through the night a mockingbird
singing in an achingly clear midnightor sleepy chirps greeting the dawn.
—2/18/00
Of course, there are some other important people who i haven't talked much about, and a few I haven't mentioned at all. I'm still not sure how various members of the Fambly (proto-)Nest would feel about being talked about in such a public place, so I won't be writing about them until I figure that out.
But the nest in general is important. These are a bunch of folks who I've been meeting with for a few months now, trying to build an intentional family with. We're starting to come together as a group, I think, and I feel privileged to know such a stellar bunch of people. A nest is a Church of All Worlds thing; basically, it's a magical intentional family. I didn't know quite what to expect going in, since this is the first formal pagan group thing i've been involved with for any length of time. But as time's gone on, I've found myself more and more comfortable with them, as I've gotten to know them and them me.
There are other important people, too—Lumiere's pretty important, since he's the other leg of the Kris-Velvet-Lumiere V. He's quite lovely! We cuddle and smooch and have this wonderfully easygoing friendship. He's a reader, and I love going through his book collection for stuff I'd like to read, and picking his brain about stuff. He's got quite a store of (both useless and useful) knowledge in that brain of his, which I like. I love people who can pull random cool facts out of their brain, oh yes I do.
And then there's Das Sprout, who's Velvet's daughter. Velvet is the non-custodial parent, and has Das Sprout every other weekend and a week a quarter. This arrangement works out to everyone's happiness, as far as I can tell. She's three and a half and tall for her age, with a crop of curly blonde hair and huge brown eyes that she already knows how to use to her best advantage. On both sides of her family, she's being raised by a tribe—on her dad's side, she had a really incredible tribe of men who help take care of her, and on her mom's side, there's Velvet, Lumiere, me, and the other members of the nest.
For someone who's still not quite out of toddlerhood, she's amazingly articulate. I once heard her scold someone who was playing too roughly with her, "I didn't like that. I am not a toy." She's strong-willed and definitely her own person, but reasonably well-behaved as long as she understands the limitations of whatever situations she's in. (Of course, she's sometimes a bit naughty--it comes with being three!) She's utterly adorable.
I never thought I'd want kids. But now that I have one in my life, I really, really like it. Kids are very cool.
I used to be involved with Brain Dead. I completely forgot about that. Heh.I got this from a numberology site--and, weirdly enough, it's almost something like accurate. amazing.
and *this* is an amazing display of loyalty to everyone's favorit underdog commercial OS, courtesy an aquaintence of mine. Yes, that is a real tattoo.
